Being slightly slow, I wondered where all my peers have gone. On Internet I mean. It's a logical question: every time you Google health or exercise or wellness a gaggle of gorgeous girls pops up    to tell you how to meditate your way to peace of mind, how to juice-boost your hormones or exercise into energy. And they are all estrogen-rich,wrinkle-poor  young women with the earnestness of the innocent.

And I love them. Truly, Yoga with Adriene is great fun even though it does terrible things to my arthritic elbows.Or there are serious, old men telling us how to meditate by breeeathing deeeep.  (Although Ram Dass does make me laugh regularly). But where are my peers, my co-conspirators in the plan to stay alive and kicking as a 60+ year old? I googled all kinds of terms and found squat. Until my hairdresser, when I complained about it said: try "older women". Yeah, awful, isn't it? I apparently don't think of myself as an older woman. Because when I did that, wow, there they are: women of my age blogging and vlogging and generally posessing the net in a very active way.


So this is good, right? I can enjoy the young ones and commune with the old ones and keep perspective on all ages, sizes, creeds and vocabularies. But I must admit that I had illusions. I had the illusion that women of my age would in general have more to do with the inner than the outer 'me'.  I thought they would be encouraging the younger generation to stop obsessing about looks and to start balancing life. I thought they would be using their life-experience to mediate between the generations. You know: incorporating their knowledge with new id20130513_121230eas and making20130513_121227 a new world. Hah! They are out there, those balanced, mature women and men. But to be perfectly honest? A lot of them are very often just as judgmental and looks-obsessed as when they were 30. I mean, hey: the sexiest over-60 year old man? Really? You're seriously looking at a 67-year old butt and judging it? A sexy bra-look? Don't wear leggings? Stop with the over-sized scarves; hiding your what????YOUR IMPERFECTIONS???!!!!


The next post on the same site was about whether or not we should colour our hair. Now, I was just debating the issue: himself doesn't want to help me any more because I'm rather finicky and hair2he wants to rush through it and although I don't mind getting older at all, God forbid that he skip a single grey hair. So I nag and he swears and, in short, I have to do it myself these days. So I was sort of thinking, seeing I have to let the contact lenses go too, why not ditch the dye? Then the lady asked whether I/we coloured my/our  hair or whether I had decided to age gracefully and go for my natural colour. You feel that dig? You dig that feel? We don't judge but natural is graceful, coloured is ungraceful? Or maybe even DISgraceful? I don't need to tell you I was up the stairs and smearing on the goo  like a shot, do I? Those streaks are Mel-made by mistake: good hey?




yoga pretzelCredit: Athlete on the Map


Then the yoga: This morning, sporting a new funky hairstyle and rather unlikely, ever so slightly garish caramel-blonde colour, I googled yoga for older people and got caught up in the nightmare of chair yoga and photo's of toothless 104-year-old Indian nuns folded up like pretzels. That last is great if the over-abundance of wrinklies becomes so bad we need to start stacking the aged but otherwise: what do I need to see that for? Is it to intimidate, make me jealous or put me off old-age to the extent that I book my one-way trip up the Alps NOW? You see, having been assured recently that one is never too old to do all kinds of things, I decided to go for a more challenging form of yoga than my lovely Dru yoga flow. I am extremely susceptible to suggestion should you not have noticed:-).


That's when I found Adriene who is funny, natural and challenging. But quite a bit younger than I am. And fitter and slimmer.To the extent that my wrists and underarms are now permanently in severe pain. Great excuse to sit on the sofa with a book but...So that's why I wanted a slightly less hard on the arms workout. The pretzel pose looks more and more like a pretzel but I either fall down and out of the pose or I take a looong time getting out of it:-)  That's why I found Senior Yoga. Which is so tame I fall asleep before I get into a pose. And in between I can't find anything that is challenging and kind and tailor-made for the fit but senescent body. I live with it, adjust, and wonder: where are the others like me?



For the moment I won't go into the whole clothing and fashion thing. You've got more to do than sit here while I rant. I'll get back to it but for now: I haven't found them all, these sites for the Seniors. I hope. Because what I have found up until now makes me feel that there is a huge gap between the 'young' and the old. The baby-boomers are either playing golf or minding the babies or working and not inclined or too tired to mix in, or they are not interested. Those who ARE online are posting under pseudonyms and have photo's of bouncy young things to hide their reality. The young set just don't seem to know we are here at all. And it should stop. Forthwith. We should mix and match and integrate and talk and debate. We must respect the young for their intelligence and energy and drive and they must respect us for our intelligence and life-skills and patience. We must use one another. The age-bashing, on both sides of the divide, must stop and we must start pulling together. Retirement can't be what it was (very briefly) in the post-war Utopia. There are jobs that need to be shared, wealth to be shared, wisdom and energy to be shared.

So I am going back to the Internet. I will continue my search for a multi-age community. If you know of people and sites that, like me, want to incorporate inspiration, knowledge, exercise and fun for all, let me know, I am tired of the segregation and age-discrimination and the sheer boredom of the one-dimensional take we are allowing to narrow our view of life. We should like young people and it's high time we get them to like us.

Read this blog that so beautifully tells it as it is at the moment: one of my favourite sites, Beauty tells it like it is. Amen, and way to go Lexie and Lindsay!